Remember how last week I mentioned that this group were predicting a nuclear attack on New York? Well surprise, surprise, they were wrong. More than that, they were wrong for the third time in a row. They admit they they got the "real Bible code" wrong, but they are now definitely certain that NYC will be nuked on 30th June/1st July 2006.

I'll be interested to see what excuses they come up with this time. Amazingly, they still insist on using the exact same scriptural proof for the 30th June 2006 as they did for their three failed predictions so far. Do people never learn? Be astounded:

When the Israelites left Egypt they ate unfermented cakes for 7 days from 1513Nisan15 (April 13th 1513 BC) until 1513Nisan21 (April 19th 1513 BC) when they crossed the Red Sea. Throughout these 7 days of the first festival of unfermented cakes, they were led by a pillar of cloud (you may have seen this in the Charlton Heston movie!) Now what would be a modern day pillar of cloud? Well it is a nuclear bomb. That is the modern day iconic pillar of cloud. But the pillar of cloud helped the Israelites and protected them from the Egyptians and was a good thing. How can a good thing from God symbolise a bad thing, like a nuclear bomb, which is from the Satanic behaviour of men?

Well blowing up one's brother with a nuclear bomb is contrary to God's commandment to love him and in particular not to kill him, other than in self defence. But God gave us free will and does permit all sorts of bad things. However the good and the greater meaning of the pillar of cloud that protected the sons of Israel from the pursuing Egyptians who wished to continue to enslave them is foreknowledge of the next nuclear bomb in order that those with faith in God's prophetic power will not be harmed by it. Now the Israelites were led by one pillar of cloud not two, so we will not see the times and dates of the next 2 nuclear bombs in advance, but we will see the time and date of the next one in advance for the scripture says...

21 And Jehovah was going ahead of them in the day in a pillar of cloud to lead them by the way, and in the night in a pillar of fire to give them light to go in the day and night.
22 The pillar of cloud would not move away from before the people in the day nor the pillar of fire in the night (Exodus 13).

These coming nuclear bombs lead the greater Israel of all faithful people on this planet out of the greater Egypt of this corrupt and morally bankrupt and spiritually dead world, which would enslave us indefinitely to destructive sins if it were able. They each one act as a warning that the ship of this administration of mankind is sinking, and that we should leave it behind and get into the lifeboats of the true church or at least of true faith quickly. Biblical foreknowledge of the time and date of the next bomb is of course a great sign from God (assuming we have this right or someone else gets it right instead of us), as the original pillar of cloud was, but it is also a wake up sign to all people of faith, to act on their faith.

"You may have seen this in the Charlton Heston movie" is about the level of biblical scholarship on which this group operates. These people are ABSOLUTELY BARKING. It makes me yearn for the carefree days of the sixteenth century when the authorities dealt with people like this in a much more appropriate manner i.e. burning, hanging, drawing, quartering, excommunication, wholesale slaughter and state-sponsored ridicule. Happy, happy days.

For a rather more satirical look at end of the world silliness, check out The Daily Gazelle's attempt to unmask the Antichrist.

The University of Exeter are running an essay competition by way of tribute to the late Colin Gunton. The essay is to be between 7000 and 9000 words long and to be entitled "The Infinity of God". The prize money is £200 and an invitation to the SST conference, and is due by 1st November 2006.

Full details here.

I only became aware of it today, but this Saturday there's a free one-day theology conference here in Manchester at Nazarene Theological College. I'm not sure about all the speakers, but I. Howard Marshall will be giving a paper on Romans 4:25 entitled "He was raised to life for our justification." Should be an interesting one if you're into Pauline studies.

The conference runs from 8.45am until 1.30pm (rearranged to avoid clashing with the football!). I'm not 100% certain I'm going but if anyone is then let me know!

I need a job. Urgently.

I'm open to all suggestions, but if anyone so much as thinks "call centre", I will come to your house and fight you.

All suggestions/substantial financial donations welcome.

As Alastair points out, people who make suggestions like this shouldn't be allowed to interpret scripture. (What is it with Daniel's "weeks" and end-of-the-world calculations? Gnnngh.) Apparently they're using the same method that Isaac Newton used to disprove the evil Catholic belief in the Trinity (what is it with end-time wackos and hatred of Catholics? Gnnngh again.)

If you're in New York next weekend, you might want to pack your radiation suit.

Hmmm.

A fiver says that when it doesn't happen the group will issue a statement that they miscalculated the date of the apocalypse and then they'll offer another new date of when the catastrophe will be rather than admitting that they're wrong.