It turns out that rather than dying, being resurrected, and ascending to heaven. Jesus emigrated to Japan and became a rice farmer until his death aged 114. Full story here.

Expect to see Jesus and the Early Samurai by Pagels and Ehrman in a bookstore near you next Easter.

"There are other of these spiritual persons, again, who fall into another kind of spiritual wrath: this happens when they become irritated at the sins of others, and keep watch on those others with a sort of uneasy zeal. At times the impulse comes to them to reprove them angrily, and occasionally they go so far as to indulge it and set themselves up as masters of virtue. All this is contrary to spiritual meekness."

St John of the Cross Dark Night of the Soul