Today at work:

Employee: Steven, can I get something from the first aid cabinet? My finger's bleeding really badly.

Me: Have you got a First Aider qualification?

Employee: Yes, I finished the course yesterday.

Employee returns 

Me: What did you need anyway?

Employee:  A plaster 'cos I cut myself.

Me: How?

Employee: I accidentally stabbed myself with the pin from my first aid course badge.